Repenting from Your Failed Resolutions | World Christian Leadership

Failure is the greatest teacher, not the greatest obstacle. Don't let it be something it is not.

We have gotten past "Quitters' Day." How many of you have heard of Quitters' Day?

Pixelated Title Card of Quitters Day

It's the second Friday of January. This year it was January 10th.

80% of people tap out by this day.

You've heard all of this before. 122,840,000 resolutions are made annually in the US. What percentage do you think are kept? Any guesses? 9%. Only 9% succeed, with 23% of people quitting by week 1 and 43% quitting by the end of January.

Question: How many of you had any type of resolution?

Why is keeping resolutions so hard? Because while making resolutions is easy, following through with resolutions is difficult. If we are committing to cut back on sugar or caffeine, to go to the gym, to read our Bible daily, to memorize more Scripture, or to give up social media for a season, it's difficult to keep the resolution because we must discipline ourselves to do something hard or what we don't necessarily want to do, even if we know doing it is better for us.

In the book Atomic Habits, James Clear concludes that if we are to create a meaningful habit, we must think not only about the actions we plan to take. Clear says, "Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become."

This should be no different for Christians. When we think about resolutions, we should begin not with what we think will simply make us better or help us personally. We should make resolutions to discipline and resolve ourselves to become the type of person we are supposed to be in Christ.

This is hard mainly because we naturally gravitate toward self-determination and self-gratification. We often find ourselves choosing our own paths or trying to make our own way. We're like the donkey pulling the plow on my Pawpaw Royce's farm who determines, "I will not do what I do not want to do. Instead, I will only do what I want to do."

When our resolutions get hard and interruptions come, it can be very easy to let them go. We all have normal, busy lives.

Personally, I was doing great on my New Year's resolutions January 1st–4th. (I even tried to get a head start by beginning them the week before.) Then we went to the hospital so my wife could be induced. There's nothing like a newborn baby to humble your resolutions.

I can tell you that I've had a hard time with them, even my Bible reading ones. It's not that I don't love the Lord. It isn't that I've been extremely busy. It's a combination of mental and physical tiredness. I know that not everyone here has a newborn baby, but we can all attest that we experience varying degrees of this tiredness in our lives.

When we miss our resolutions, we feel like we've failed. Then we give up and go back to the old way of doing things.

We can repent from our failed resolutions. We don't have to give up—financial, business, recreation, family, ministry. It's always easier to do things how we've always done them rather than try again to reform ourselves, even if we believe it's better for us.

The Reason Why We Fail in Our Resolutions: The Battle Between the Mind and the Flesh

Romans 7:14-20

Paul is talking about the difference between the law and the spirit, and he is showing that the law exposes the sin that we are committing. The real difference is between the flesh and the spirit. He speaks of this tug of war, this inner war within us. He says that he does what he doesn't want to do and doesn't do what he wants to do because of the flesh.

"The desire to do what is good is with me, but there is no ability to do it." (Rom. 7:18)

What does this mean? He wants to do good, but he doesn't have the ability in himself to do it.

This is true. Our resolutions, our goals, our ministry efforts. We can do no good on our own, because not one of us is good.

The same applies to our resolutions.

When we want to do good, sin comes. Similarly, when we set out to do something that is good, that we think will better ourselves, something is going to come.

Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord that there will be a day when we will not have to fight with ourselves.

Until then, here is how we can repent from our failed resolutions:

Realize That You Are Not Perfect

We aren't. We're going to mess up. We may often say that interruptions keep us from doing it. However, C.S. Lewis explains that these interruptions are not abnormal: "The great thing, if one can, is to stop regarding all the unpleasant things as interruptions of one's 'own,' or 'real' life. The truth is, of course, that what one calls the interruptions are precisely one's real life—the life God is sending one day by day." What happens in life is what God is sending us. We're not going to get to create this perfect time where we have 50 hours for sermon prep or our 2 hours to work out or perfect eating plan at all times.

Repent from the Negative Aspects of Your Failure

However, this doesn't mean we should just be fatalistic about what's happening. If you're not reaching your goals or following through with your habits, then there may be something wrong with your approach. If you're going to make a habit a priority, then you have to repent from those areas. Laziness is the biggest one. It's what keeps me from working out, writing, or keeping a deep work schedule. Selfishness can be one. Gluttony. This isn't to say all the reasons you miss are bad. You may choose to go to the doctor with your spouse rather than work out or spend time with your kids over working on your business. Even in ministry, you may choose to shorten your travel to be at home. These are good reasons. But for those personal habits, it's typically a matter of priority rather than being obligated to do something else.

Reassess Your Goals to See What's Realistic versus What Isn't

If you're missing your habits, reassess. It's better to run after one habit and do it well than three mediocrely. The widow who gave her two coins was more faithful than Ananias and Sapphira, who gave a larger portion but did it deceitfully and poorly.

Don't try to do what you think you're "supposed" to do. Do what makes you better. Don't simply try to be the best. Do your best. What is best for you?

What's realistic for you and your rhythms of life? If you're bivocational, trying to work two jobs and take care of family, you may have to rethink how you go about certain goals.

Recommit to What Matters

Once you've honed in on what is most important, recommit to it. In the Baptist world, we often hear of "rededication." Whether you believe that's a valid commitment or not, the sentiment matters. Repentance doesn't mean that you start back at January 1. You begin right now. Turning back to what matters most doesn't mean that you have to make up for your missteps. It simply means that you have to turn and run after it. That's it. If you're trying to be a healthier person, then start today and not tomorrow. If you want to be more efficient for ministry purposes, then start today and not tomorrow. If you want to incorporate family worship into your rhythms, then start today and not tomorrow. When we reconnect to what matters most, we don't delay starting. If we do, then we show that it really doesn't matter the most.

For you and me, we have a lot of irons in the fire. We have a lot of dishes on our plate. We have to focus on what matters the most, and then we have to say no to other things that are good but not the best thing for us or our families or our ministries. If you're trying to do too much, then you're really just doing nothing. Recommit to what matters the most.

Restrict Yourself to the No Two Days Approach

The no two days approach is held by many, but I learned it from a productivity guru named Matt D'Avella. It's the idea that you never go two days missing a habit. So if your goal is to work out four out of seven days a week and you miss a day, you don't beat yourself up about it. You just say, "I'm not missing tomorrow." Don't go two days missing the most important things. I may say something a little sacrilegious here: some of us may miss our quiet time or Bible reading for the day. I know—good, bad, just don't miss it, right? But really, on those days when it gets crazy and interruptions happen and maybe you don't read your quiet time or read as much as you want to, it's OK. God isn't going to ding you on your good Christian board. But what does matter is that, if you want that time with God to develop your relationship with Him, then don't miss two days in a row. Honestly, this morning was my second day. Yesterday was really hard, and I didn't get to read any of my Bible really until 10:30/11 PM, which, if I had planned that intentionally, that's fine. Read the Bible at the most optimal time for you. But it was more a matter of pushing it aside, even though I had done other things in the day that I could've replaced the Bible reading with. I wasn't going to let it go two days in a row like this. So I got up and read it this morning, and I feel the difference for me—not because it was in the morning but because I was more intentional about my habit.

Run After It With Everything You've Got

At the end of all this, you just have to run after it with everything you've got. If it really matters to you and you really think it's going to make a big difference in your life and the lives of people around you, then run after it with everything you've got. Paul talks about finishing the race and completing the task that the Lord Jesus has given him to testify to the gospel of God's grace (Acts 20:24). He talks about fighting the good fight and winning the race. God desires for us to finish the race and complete the task that He has given us. We are all members of the body of Christ, which means we have different functions.

We can repent from our failed resolutions and get our habits back on track before we just give up on them.